My parents took my cat for a ride in the car. Second weekend in a row. They think its fun. Dear God
i jhust puked up my retainher.
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
Randomize
