i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
I just discovered how perfect a shot glass is for putting your chicken nugget dipping sauces into. Like I'll probably do this when I'm a mother feeding my children.
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
He tried to fight me not realizing that I work as a bouncer in the the same bar we were in. His night ended with him in handcuffs, missing teeth, PLUS I got his shots that he ordered since he didn't get to drink them.
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize
