I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Ever try to swallow something and have it go up into your nose instead? Yeah, I just sneezed bacon.
Randomize