Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
your brother just told me that Guinness is the first book of the Bible...
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
I convinced a German girl that I was born while my mom was water skiing and I preceded to barefoot ski behind her via the umbilical cord...
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
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