But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
btw ... thanks for not giving me up as the craigslist killer
i owe you one
thanks for snagging those panties for me
can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
the cop asked for your social security number and you gave her your high school locker combo
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
Stoned in a petco on a Saturday. I figured out that ferrets can eat themselves out. Just picture it. Never leaving.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
Um...It has come to my attention that I may have said some rather vulgar things about Sean Connery to you and anyone listening last night, so...I apologize for that. I meant the things I said. But still. Sorry.
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
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