Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
I had to use the resin knife to take the staples out of my tax return forms. Tax returns and a search warrant?
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
you left a note on your car that said " please dont tow, im to drunk to drive. safety first!"
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
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