She is in my trunk
Rescue me. My white trash great uncle just pulled out his belly at the restaurant to show us how big this woman's tit was
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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