Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
That's intense
tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
I just need to drink whiskey get off and eat some cheese. Why is that so fucking hard for god to deliver.
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
Randomize
