oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
the raccoons are back...
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