no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
I really hope jumping jacks prevent pregancy because I'm kind of banking on it right now, do you know why there's a unicycle in the corner of my room?
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
