I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
Randomize
