everything was goin great until he pulled out his ed hardy lighter and smoked in my face like he was cool.
it's like you attract all the douchebags that nobody wants. people should thank you.
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
Found my smoke alarm in a ziploc in my toilet...again
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
I just hope the day something happens to me my phone just dies, like literally died and will never turn on ever again. I feel like God owes me that much.
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
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