Yeah but if I do that, I'd have to buy my own stomach pump for the house. That doesn't seem like a great thing to have sitting on the coffee table.
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
My housemates are judging me because I'm high at 8am and making Spongebob shaped Mac and Cheese
They know nothing, John Stoned.
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
Randomize
