so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
you turned your livingroom into a bong?
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
Randomize
