tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
you googled " I want to buy a live ostrich". I'd say you were pretty wasted.
im sitting in the back of my pickup eating an artichoke. please come find me, im scared.
that was a mass text, wasnt it?
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
I just walked away from a youth soccer tournament popping every birth control pill I had left in the pack.
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
Randomize
