I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
Most awkward thing ever just happened. I was reaching in my purse to get something and a condom fell out into the woman's lap next to me. At least she knows I'm safe.
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
Went to the doctor's today. The lady took one look at my throat and said "oh god"
Too much penis in there.
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
