You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
No alcohol sales on Election Day. WTF? Today, of all days, I need to be splurged to to vote for any of these morons running for president.
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
If I had your ass I would rule the world
Randomize
