with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
and i looked up. we had an audience...
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
Every time I try to stand up the back of my head feels like a bunch of little elves are beating the inside of my scalp with their toy making tools. What disease could this be?
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
I’ve had a lot of vodka, 3 different dicks and no food since last night. Come get me
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize
