I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
I was just like oh sorry I'm peeling meanwhile my legs are on either side of his head and I look like a fucking Komodo dragon
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
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