Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
Randomize
