Just remembered I told my boss that matt used to make me toss his salad like every time we hooked up. Nice
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
Randomize
