I'm at a job interview and I smoked a little before I came. I thought it would make me less nervous. Boy was I wrong.
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
I mean, I'm shallow, narcissistic, and selfish, but I'm an amazing friend sometimes
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
Randomize