How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
The president of the frat said he was honored to award me "Best Overall Blow Jobs", free admission to all their future parties, and a $20 gift certificate to Denny's. I'm not sure if I feel proud or if that's just the burrito coming back up...
Also, what are the symptoms of syphilis?
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
I'm putting his belongings the garage sale so he can buy his own stuff back. # divorced life. Thanks for cheating on me you tone deaf dick biscuit that'll be $20. Haha.
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
And then he peed in my hair
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