Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
I'm sobbing to NWA
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
Randomize
