How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
I told my coworker that I'm going to a dinner party and was asked to bring wine and pregnancy tests and he was like.. I miss being 20
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
So I had this brilliant idea that I would sleep in all sorts of sweatpants and sweatshirts... Apparently I thought I could "sweat" off the drunk in my sleep and that it would make me feel better when I woke up
Randomize
