did you get engaged???
I swear to god Optimus Prime and Megatron are fighting in my head right now.
He called me an ungrateful bitch because I lauged when he asked me "how do you me and a bed sound?"
Like I should be grateful for the 5 minutes I sit on top of him and stare at the wall.
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
Gave his drunk ass water, & he poured it on my shirt while saying "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!" When reminded of it today he replied with, "at least you came in first place"
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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