so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
Dear drunk me, don't shave my balls til you're sober. My junk looks like a pomeranian with mange.
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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