i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
No more Irish car bombs ever.
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
The bosnian sent me a sext with his dick next to a comcast remote. It went up to the "stop" button. Ironic and appropriate. Grab your remote and imagine it.
You've ruined television for me.
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
Randomize
