I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA'
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
this hospital has no fireball
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
I want an apology pizza with SORRY IM A DOUCHE spelled out on it in pepperoni
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
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