The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
She told me I should be a condom model.
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time
I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
Btw I puked in your glovebox
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