Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
Had a girl with a moustache tattoo on her hand give me a handjob. That shit was classy as fuck. I felt like I should be wearing a monocle or something.
Randomize