Do you ever close your eyes when your having sex with your girlfriend and pretend she didn't get fat after high school?
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
Awkward family moment #1: walked in on my 15 yr old nephew packing a bowl. Nephew says- "lets not ruin christmas and keep this our little secret"
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
Randomize
