I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
the problem with having sex for lunch when its 98 degrees outside is that I can't tell if its sweat or semen running down my leg as I walk back in the office
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
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