She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
she went apple picking. why dont we do cute things like that? let's go to a pumpkin patch!
because we're not cute. we're sluts. and sluts don't go apple picking.
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
Are my feet made of real feet?
Do you remember that time on the drunk bus when I kept thanking the bus driver for serving our country?
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
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