omg omg i just fucked paul. i need to stop doing this kind of thing.
wait, who's paul?
exactly.
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
Do you know how hard it is to masturbate with a runny nose?
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
Ever get that feeling that you're the back up booty call and half way through securing the fake date excuse to try to get in your pants, the guy hears back from the original booty call and drops the conversation with no explanation?
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
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