normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me.
Uuh, dude you came running out of the bar screaming you didn't want to hear that song, ran face first into a truck, spun around 3 times and hit the sidewalk. I tried to catch you.
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
Ryan friended me on LinkedIn and it took everything in my power not to endorse him for sexual dysfunction as a skill.
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
omg how embarrassing to not hear the delivery person knocking because you're singing "where are you Pizza" to the tune of "where are you christmas" too loudly
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
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