Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
Apparently I took a selfie with fried chicken at 2 am....I'm still trying to figure out where I got the chicken. I thought I was making mac & cheese.
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
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