If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
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