Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
worse hangover than the time you almost threw up in a plant in front of your daycare kids?
...I don't remember telling you about that but yes
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
A girl in McDonalds just asked if I was in here wasted a few nights ago throwing fries at the staff, I said it was my twin
We both know that wasn't me
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