whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
Apparently I whispered "Jesus was here" and bailed out of the moving taxi.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
One of my students submitted a thesis proposal to find the exact correlation between desire for sexual intercourse and vaginal heat.
Tell me you accepted it! This is critical fucking research!
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
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