It's true. Ladies love me because I'm so strong and they feel safe. Not because of my pseudo charm and their impaired judgement after several drinks...
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
i just masturbated with purell and my dick burns and smells like a hospital
whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
In other news, people don't judge you when you buy a vibrator if you buy a funny birthday card and bag with it. I learned that this weekend.
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
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