Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
I have demons in me.
when i say i joined a midget dating site why do u assume i was drunk
I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
tonight lets celebrate not being married
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
I want to be your penis for a week.
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
Randomize