Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
Yeah, he hid all the toilet paper and took a video of me looking for it before I shit my pants. Definitely playing that clip at our wedding.
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
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