He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Randomize
