please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
I'm so hungover even the car commercials make me nauseas
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
Randomize
