so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
When I am this hungover I become increasingly grateful for having my own private office
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
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