bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
I don't deserve a penis
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
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