I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
So I've only had a mustache for about 5 minutes and I'm already pretty sure it's the best decision I've ever made.
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
I text the word "masturbation" so much, all it only takes my iPhone to auto-spell it is for me to type "mas".
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
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