Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
It's less than a hour into 2020 and I already want to punch some people in the face
Randomize