you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
N I'm drinking this invention I call "do-it-fluid" I had a bottle of vodka that was 3/4th empty, so I put in 1/4th rum, 1/4th tequila, 1/4th whisky... it's definitely the worst idea ever..
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
Randomize
